Thank you so much for the help you sent us. They were extremely effective, and performed a great service for us. I did want to raise a couple of concerns we had about their methods, as well as a personnel issue we’d like you to address.
As you probably know by now, your group captured a weasel, and interrogated him. We found their methods a bit disturbing. I realize that Maureen’s use of poison ivy as a booby trap might have given them ideas, but using it, um, as an interrogation device was going a bit far. (They used poison ivy on him. They made him stare at the salve. It was disturbing.) I’m not convinced that there wasn’t a better way to approach this. In the future, we’ll want to handle all questioning within Chippendale. And we’ll want some assurances before we turn over any other prisoners we might capture.
Additionally, one of your people left a note purporting to be from another of your people, in which they hit on my second in command, Maureen. Maureen is mated, and she and her mate are in a long-term monogamous relationship. (It’s really sweet how they’ve been able to keep the sparkle for so long. I don’t know that the “for life” thing is something I’d ever really want, but she and Jared do make a good case for it. But I digress.) Maureen was very annoyed by this, and wants it to stop immediately (she told me I was to underline that twice) . Please make it clear to your people that our mating practices are not a joking matter.
I don’t want to sound ungrateful, but I feel it’s important that we maintain open communications so that we can continue to maintain a good relationship. Thank you for all your help, and we look forward to returning the favor soon.